What I Learned from Grand Leadership Seminar with JOHN MAXWELL in Jakarta, 22/07/16 Session 2 of 2
“Everything worthwhile in life is uphill. And the only way to go uphill is to be intentional.” ~ John Maxwell
3 words describes intentional living:
- Deliberate
They have thought about what they’re doing. Considering it. - Consistence
Climb, dont slide. Hiking 3 days = sliding 1 day to the point where you started. - Willful
You make a choice to go uphill.
The challenge of every leader is to get people to live in uphill pattern when they feel the downhill lives.
“Most people don’t live their lives, they accept their lives.”
Be Intentional !
- Be intentional in your growth!
Be intentional in your personal growth. Why? It’s impossible to have a better tomorrow unless you’re growing today. Stay the same is not the way to be successful. We automatically get older. But we dont automatically grow/get better. Growth is not automatic. It’s not natural. John’s dad: I dont pay you to do chores, but I’ll pay you to read books. The sign that you’re growing is yesterday doesnt excite you anymore. If yesterday still excite you, you’re in trouble: you’re not growing! - Be intentional in your attitude!
Attitude is a choice. It’s the difference maker. All things being equal to person with good attitude. The issue is not about the problem/challenge, the issue is about the attitude! The moment I determine to be happy is the moment I realize nobody is responsible to my happiness. - Be intentional in your purpose!
What’s your purpose in life? The most important days in your life are the day when you’re born, and the day when you find out the reason why you’re here.
To discover purpose in life, there are 2 paths:
1. What is my passion? What am I passionate about? What do you love? Do what you love, love what you do. The value about passion is it gives you energy. Because 80% of your time will lead to your purpose. Passion is what energizes us. When you find your passion, you will be discipline about it. Ask these questions to yourself: 1. What makes you happy? 2. What do you cry about? 3. What do you dream about? The answers will help you to find your passion in life. Average people want other people to be average people. The only people that have energy for a long period of time are people that have passion. It’s possible to be passionate about something that you’re not good at, but dont make it as a carreer, make it as a hobby.
2. What am I good at? What are my strength? But most people are trained to work on their weakness! If you work on your weakness, you will always be an average. You need to know what you do well. In matters of choice, work on your weaknesses. In matters of skills, work on your strengths. In matters of choice in attitude, work on it if it’s any of your weaknesses.
The life-changing rule of 5: do only 5 most important things everyday. Priority! Focus! Consistent! What do you want to accomplish? Find the right tools.
John’s rule of 5 in writing: Read. Think. File. Ask questions. Write.
It took John 4 years to find his rule of 5 in writing. Find out yours!
The greatest gap in the world is the gap between knowing and doing.
When opportunity comes it’s too late to prepare!
To achieve something great you need good people around you. Teamwork makes the dream work. - Be intentional in your significance.
A person’s significance is the one who adds value to other people. Significance is pretty much about others. Once you’ve tasted significance, success will never satisfy you.
Rule of 5 in significance (things I do everyday to be significant)
- Value people. Because if I value you as a person, I’ll add value to you. It’s the foundation of significance.
- Think of ways to add value to people. When I’m with them, how can I add value to them?
- Look for ways to add value people. We see things as we are, not as they are. 2 people can be in the same experience but they can get very different value. Dont become harvest-focused, become see-focused. Dont become result-focused, become process-focused.
- Add value to people. Who do I add value to today?
- Encourage people to add value to other people.
Experience is NOT the best teacher; but EVALUATED experience is.
The greatest way to learn is by evaluating what you learned and pick which one you would implement in your life.
Now I’ll leave you ponder with these question and implement it in your life:
What I’m passionate about:
What I’m good at:
What my rule of 5 (things I wanna do everyday with my passion & talent):
Have a great, meaningful, intentional life, my dear friends!
Cheers,
Nuniek Tirta
What I learned from Grand Leadership Seminar with JOHN MAXWELL in Jakarta, 22/07/16 Session 1 of 2
John Maxwell is an American author, speaker, and pastor who has written many books, primarily focusing on leadership. He is 69 years old, been married for 47 years. His dad is 94, been married for 67 years before his wife passed away.
Hubby and I bought Gold ticket for his Grand Leadership Seminar in Jakarta last July 22nd 2016, each worth IDR 2,8mio. We went there with other Tiket.com Board of Directors. I equipped myself with bluetooth keyboard to take notes, and here’s what I can share with you.
5 Levels of Leadership
- Position.
Keyword: rights
People follow because they HAVE to.
This is a good place to start, but not a good place to stay. With this level they have authority, but they don’t give choice. Having leadership position doesn’t make us a leader! The problem is: you dont get the energy and time and commitment of people u lead because they’re there just to keep the job. In this level 1 company, people clear the desk right on time when the working hour ends. - Permission.
Keyword: relationship
People follow because they WANT you.
People give you permission to lead them. The energy greatly increased. Energy is related to relationship. When people likes you, they’ll work harder for you. The leader believes the people.
3 things level 2 leaders do well :
1. They listen very well. They are great listener.
2. They learn, observe well, watching people. Why? It’s not what people say, it’s what they do that tells you what you should do.
3. They lead, they serve. They walk beside the people. A servant leader doesn’t use power to lead, but use relationship. They have people work WITH you, not work FOR you. They have workers, not SLAVE. If you’re at the top all alone, you’re not a leader, you’re a hiker. Leaders are defined by how many people with them. Behavior is a culture. Vision in a company is not nearly important as culture. Because culture is what you do, and what you do determine where you go.
“In my 30s leadership, I told people what to do. In my 60s leadership, I ask questions. The first responsible in a leader is to listen to people. Why? You have to find your people before you lead your people. And you find your people by asking questions. I need to understand them by listening to them.” ~ John C Maxwell - Production
Keyword: result
People folow because of what you have done for the ORGANIZATION.
People follow level 3 leader because you’ve been successful and they want to be successful too. Level 3 leadership is about winning. They’re successful. You don’t leave leadership position, you build leadership position from 1 to 5.
3 things level 3 leaders do well:
1. Lead by example. People do by what people see. It’s not what u say, it’s what u do to people that makes u great leader. They understand the power of example.
2. They understand the power of momentum. They not only show people what to do, but create a momentum. When you have positive momentum, people would think the better of they are. To have momentum is leader’s bestfriend. How they create momentum? By results! When you’re winning, nothing hurts. Momentum solves 80% of the problem in ur company. It’s the greatest problem solver in your company!
3. They attract better people. How? We attract what we are, not what we want. Be that person! Too many leaders are like travel agent: they told people to go where themselves never go. - People Development
Keyword: Reproduction; Multiplication.
People follow because of what you have done for THEM.
Level 4 leaders mentor people. People follow them because they made people’s life better.
3 things level 4 leaders do well:
1. They recruit very well. Why? They understand the secret of getting good people. The key? Having clear picture of who you want to hire. When you recruit people, you gotta have picture of what kind of people you want!
2. They position their people well. They put them in the right position.
3. They equip well. They’re good at equipping people. Equipping is essential to be successful.
5 steps of equipping:
1. I do it! Be able to do what you want uour people to do. You better be good at it. Don’t equip people if you’re bad at it, they’ll be as bad as you. 2. I do it and you are with me. If you really wanna equip your people, never do your business all alone by yourself. Always have somebody with you.
3. You coach them, pass the ball to them, they get practice with you.
4. You do it!
5. Secret sauce: you do it and someone is with you, you’ve never equipped someone until they equip someone else.
5. Pinnacle
Keyword: Respect
People follow because of who you are and what you represent.
I did enjoy the seminar very much, and learned a lot more than this note. Will post the Session 2 after this!
Cheers,
Nuniek Tirta
Tentram Tanpa Pembantu
Dulu, setiap kali nggak ada pembantu, ketentraman keluarga kami selalu terganggu.
Faktor PERTAMA, karena ekspektasi masing-masing yang terlalu tinggi. Bukan, bukan ekspektasi tentang pembantu ideal. Tapi ekspektasi tentang pasangan ideal.
Buat saya (dulu), suami ideal adalah yang seperti papa saya: meskipun kerja cari uang dari jam 10 pagi sampai jam 10 malam, tetap mau bantu2 mama kerjain urusan rumah tangga. Mulai dari cuci baju, cuci piring, nyapu ngepel, jemur baju, nyetrika, bahkan masak, you name it lah, semuanya papa bisa dan biasa. Dan itu dilakukan on daily basis, back to back with mom and children, bukan hanya sesekali atau kalau ada maunya aja loh.
Sedangkan sepertinya buat suami (dulu), istri ideal adalah yang seperti mamanya: melayani segala kebutuhan suami. Istilahnya from A to Z, dari kepala sampai kaki. Wong nasihat eyang putrinya ke saya sehari setelah kami menikah saja masih saya ingat jelas, saat kami duduk berdua di ruang makan: “Suami musti dilayani. Kalau mau makan harus disiapkan. Kalau suami belum pulang, ditunggu, makan malam sama-sama.”
Parahnya, dulu kami menganggap yang IDEAL itu adalah yang SEHARUSNYA. Menganggap bahwa apa yang dilihat sejak kecil itu, ya sudah seharusnya begitu. Padahal ideal itu ya ideal, alias sempurna. Mana ada manusia yang sempurna? Apalagi didikannya beda total :))
Faktor KEDUA, karena saling perhitungan. Kira2 seperti ini simulasinya:
“Aku udah cape kerja, nyetir pulang macet2an, sampe rumah masih harus nyuci piring panci kotor.”
“Loh emang aku di rumah nggak kerja? Coba deh gantian urusin 2 bayi seharian tanpa bantuan, nyuci nyapu ngepel sambil urusin online shop sendirian.”
*kemudian saling lempar bayi*
“Aku kan udah nyetrika sebakul, masa musti nyuci botol juga?”
“Yaudah nih gantian begadang nenenin si adek, bisa?”
*kemudian rebutan nenen* #eh
“Udah dibantuin gendongin bayi juga! Masih misah misuh.”
“Hah, dibantuin?? Emangnya anak ini anak aku doang???”
*kemudian minggat bawa bayi*
Yah dulu gitu deh kura2, eh kira2 😂
Sekarang? Teteup.
Hehe nggak deng. Sejak beberapa tahun lalu sih udah jauh beda. Terutama sejak kita ikut retreat pasutri dan saya dapat banyak ilmu di kuliah konseling ya. Kita udah biasa hidup tanpa pembantu. Anak2 juga tambah mandiri. Kalo ada pembantu syukur, kalo nggak ada ya wasyukurilah.
3 bulan lalu sebelum liburan ke Banyuwangi sempat ambil pembantu di yayasan. Awalnya lumayan, nggak lama kemudian aku nggak tahan karena buanyak omong dan ngibul melulu. Too much bullshitt. Sehari sebelum liburan ke Jepang, dia aku pulangkan ke alamnya, eh ke kampungnya. “Kalo saya mau balik lagi boleh nggak non?” “Nggak usah.” “Saya betah di sini non” Ya sayanya yang nggak betah ada situ.
Ok back to the point, jadi gimana bedanya dulu dan sekarang?
Contoh ya…
Kemarin saya tepar selama 2 hari karena kecapean. Suami gantian bangun pagi siapin anak2 sampai dijemput sekolah. Sebelum berangkat kerja dia masih sempat beresin tempat tidur.
Malamnya dia baru sampai rumah jam 10 karena harus jenguk orang sakit di Karawaci dan lanjut makan malam bareng para BOD. Sampai rumah nggak langsung istirahat, tapi benerin rak sepatu yang rusak.
Habis itu dia nyuci piring setumpuk, lalu aku peluk & pijit sambil bilang “You dont have to do that, I’ll do it tomorrow. You must be tired”, yang dijawabnya “Nggak kok cuma sakit punggung aja”, tapi tetap dicucinya piring panci gelas sampai tuntas. Aku pun meneruskan menjemur pakaian.
Sudah selesai? Belummm. Jam 12 malam lewat, kami melanjutkan sampul buku anak2 karena mereka sudah harus tidur. Saya sampul buku2 kecil, dia sampul buku2 besar. Saya sudah selesai dan ketiduran, jam 2 pagi saya diciumnya untuk membangunkan saya supaya pindah ke kamar.
For all those things he did, made me love him even more. Well, who wouldn’t? 😍
Dulu saya sempat berusaha keras mengubahnya menjadi suami ideal versi saya tapi gagal dan dia semakin resisten. Begitu pula sebaliknya, dengan caranya dia sempat berusaha mengubah saya menjadi istri ideal versi dia tapi gagal dan saya juga makin resisten.
Sekarang saya sadar betul, bahwa kita tidak bisa mengubah pasangan menurut cara kita, kalau ia sendiri tidak mau berubah. Yang bisa kita lakukan adalah mengubah perlakuan kita terhadapnya, dan disadari secara langsung maupun tidak, cepat atau lambat perubahan itu juga akan mengubah cara pasangan memperlakukan kita.
Kamis, 21 July 2016
Nuniek Tirta Ardianto
PS: photo by Sweet Escape
Sama si anak kicil kriwil 7 tahun lalu, waktu liburan di Anyer.
#supereasykid dari bayi, tapi kadang2 attachmentnya terlalu kuat ke mommy.
Misal, kalo mommy kebangun karena mimpi buruk, tiba2 dia nangis juga, padahal tempat tidurnya beda.
Kopilot by Aurellie
Jl Raya Pondok Gede No 9 Jaktim 13810
02180882511
Instagram @kopilot_id
Latest date of visit: 17 July 2016 8pm
Latest chosen menu:
Soto betawi 45k
Chicken cordon bleu 35k
Fish n chips 40k
Green tea latte 35k
Taro latte 30
Choco rum 35k
Hot tea 8k
Had late dinner here with my little family tonight. It was our second visit within less than a week. This restaurant has been evolving a couple of times within a decade, and we often go there even before I’m married.
We love their newly-renovated interior & exterior designed with concept all about flight. There’s a flight miniature on the ceiling, flight-related information framed on the wall, and imported flight magazines too!
On my previous visit last Wednesday, I had priviledge to chit chat with the owner. She said it was her child’s idea to revamp the place, since the child is an architect. They’re from air force family, that’s where the concept came from :)
I like their soto betawi and spaghetti agliolio. But the choco rum is too sweet for me, I couldn’t finish it. Kids love the purple taro latte, it tastes good and comes with pretty appearance too :) Too bad none of us drink coffee thus we can’t comment on their speciality.
Service is homy & friendly, but could be improved by having digitalized program for order so they won’t miss any order from customer (just like they missed my choco rum). And it would be perfect if they also accept payments by cards.
Overall, I like it and will surely come back for the cozy ambience (loveee those big glass windows and cozy sofa). Besides, it’s just a stone-throw away from home :)) Come drop by if you’re around!
Sunday, 17 July 2016
Nuniek Tirta - Enjoyed Kopilot
Our lunch after Sunday school today, 17 July 2016 🍴
Nasi Uduk Kebon Kacang Bang Hepi
Jl Raya Jatiwaringin No 93
Telp 087782883030
Chosen menu:
Nasi uduk of course @Rp2,700
Ayam goreng @Rp17,500
Bebek goreng @Rp26,000
Ati ampela @Rp6,000
Kerupuk putih @Rp1,500
Es teh manis @Rp5,000
Es jeruk @Rp10,000
Es krim @Rp8,000
Lalap & sambal: free
Taste: so so
Place: so so
Price: so so
Overall: so so 😜
Tairyo Kelapa Gading
Jl. Kelapa Gading Boulevard No. 30-31
Telp 0214526608 / 0214533201
Date of visit: 16 July 2016 6-8pm
Chosen menu: all you can eat package with free ocha
Weekend Price:
IDR 189k++/adult
IDR 99k++/child
Excluding Tax:
6% Service Charge
10% PB1
Just had dinner here with our family to celebrate our mom’s belated birthday.
There were 12 of us, but they charged it only 10 adults and 1 child. Why? Because child under 80cm gets free of charge, and child over 140cm gets full charge.
Was it worth the price? Yes! It was even less expensive than I expected. It has always been our favorite place for years to celebrate something, but we used to have it at Tairyo Grand Indonesia.
When I wanted to book it a few days ago, I was so sad to find the fact that they are no longer operating in Grand Indonesia. Whyyy??? As far as I see it was always been full :(((
Anyway, although the menu at this branch is a bit limited compared to the one in Grand Indonesia (where they served unlimited salmon sashimi for all you can eat package!), but it’s pretty fair.
The taste is satisfying, except sirloin steak that tastes too salty. Our favorite ones are salmon steak, mushroom beef roll, special sauce beef, dory karaage, and of course their signature dish Tairyo banana flambe.
Will I come back? Sure. We even have planned to do it again on September to celebrete me & my dad in law’s birthday, and also the return of my sister & brother in law from UK.
Hope Tairyo would still offer the same all you can eat package by then, and with special discount promotion pleaseee :)) You should try it too while it lasts. Itadakimaaassss!!!
Saturday, 16 July 2016
Nuniek Tirta ~ food comma in Tairyo 😸
Yummy macaroni ala mommy
2 malam lalu mommy bikin sup makaroni kebanyakan, jadi besokannya mommy olah lagi buat sarapan. Mau dibikin macaroni panggang atau schotel, tapi bahan2nya nggak ada karena baru aja balik liburan hampir sebulan. Nggak ada terigu, susu, bawang bombay, telur, bahkan lada pun nggak ada.
Jadi gimana? Ya mommy cari cara kreatif supaya bisa diolah dan tetap enak. Males nunggu pake oven juga karena anak2 sudah pada lapar. Jadi mommy olah pake bahan2 terbatas yang ada dan pakai penggorengan happycall aja. Eh ternyata anak2 doyan banget!
Nah kemarin siangnya, eyangnya anak2 dateng bawain apa tebak? Sup makaroni juga! Hahaha… Tapi lebih lengkap isinya, ada sosis, ayam, dan wortelnya juga. Cuma karena kita makannya memang nggak banyak, jadi pagi ini masih ada. Karena anak2 udah nggak mau kuahnya, Mommy ulangi lagilah olahan dengan bahan2 terbatas seperti kemarin.
Ini bahan-bahannya…
1 mangkuk macaroni sisa kemarin (buang kuahnya) 😁
120ml susu coklat diet punya daddy 😜
1 cup salted butter sisa dari pesawat 😝
1 mangkuk kecil keju mozarella
1 bungkus seaweed
Begini caranya…
Panaskan happycall. Tuangkan susu sampai mendidih. Masukkan macaroni. Tutup happycall, kecilkan api. Kalau susu sudah menyusut, masukkan salted butter sampai meleleh, aduk sampai rata. Taburi keju mozarella, tunggu sampai menyatu. Angkat, tuang ke piring saji. Dekorasi dengan seaweed yang sudah digunting kecil2. Makaroni siap disantap 😋
Selamat mencoba!
Jumat, 15 Juli 2016
Nuniek Tirta ~ udah musti belanja💃🏻
Sweet Escape !
On our family vacation last year to Batu - Malang, I hired a local professional photographer to capture moments while we’re in Batu Secret Zoo. The reason was simply because I don’t want to be missed in the frame, since I was the only one who loves taking pictures.
On our family vacation this year to Osaka-Kyoto-Tokyo, I wanted to do the same. But flying a photographer just to take photos of us is so out of the option. I wanted to hire a local professional photographer, but how? And how about the cost, wouldn’t it be so expensive?
Thank God I found out about Sweet Escape, a holiday photography service powered by Axioo photography. Their local photographers are spread in 230 cities worldwide, including those I visit in Japan. I chose Kyoto over Osaka and Tokyo because of its authenticity.
So how does Sweet Escape works? Simple, just visit sweetescape.com for bookings. You will then meet the local photographer in that town, at the appointed venue. How about the cost? Their price is simple. It’s either $400 or €400 for 2 hours photoshoot!
We met our friendly photographer Danica in Arashiyama Bamboo Grove. She’s an Indonesian living in Japan and has day job as an architec. My firstborn has been wishing to be an architect and to live in Japan for so long. So I said, she’s living my daughter’s dream :)
In 3 working days after photoshoot, I got the edited photos ready to be downloaded. Truly hassle free! Was it worth it? Yes, every penny. Will I recommend Sweet Escape to friends? Absolutely. That’s why I’m writing this :)
Nuniek Tirta ~ Love Sweet Escape
5 Travel Tips Hemat ke Jepang ala Nuniek Tirta 😜
Tujuan: Osaka, Kyoto, Tokyo
Durasi: 2 minggu (29 Juni - 13 Juli)
1. Berangkat pakai budget airline tanpa bagasi aja, masing2 bawa koper kabin. Isinya baju cukup untuk seminggu. Kami pakai AirAsia dari Tiket.com yg waktu booking tahun lalu lagi ada promo potongan harga 150rb/person, nettnya cuma sekitar 1,75jtan untuk Jakarta-Osaka (one way).
2. Pada hari ke-7 di Jepang nginep di tempat yg ada coin laundry & dryer untuk cuci baju. Kami pilih hotel APA Shinjuku Gyoen, ratenya USD 267 untuk DUA kamar per malam. Enaknya di sana sambil nunggu cucian bisa sambil onsen gratis :) Biaya nyuci ¥300 dan dryer ¥200, nyetrika gratis pake trouser press.
3. Cari festival atau garage sale. Pas kami pindah ke Khaosan World Asakusa, eh lagi ada Kappabashi Street Festival dan dapet barang2 garage sale murah muraaahh. Buat nampung barang belanjaan, pakai aja tas lipat besar tambahan yang dibawa dari rumah. Tapi kalo nemu Samsonite guedeee lagi sale cuma 3 jutaan dan tax free pula ya rejeki, jangan ditolak :p Kami dapat di Lotte Duty Free yg di Kyoto Station.
4. Pulangnya baru deh pakai airlines regular, dapet makan dan bagasi yang dianter langsung sampai kota tujuan akhir (Jakarta). Kami pakai Philippine Airlines dari Tokyo ke Jakarta yang harganya 3,2jtan per orang. Narita-Manila sharecode ANA, Manila-Jakarta sharecode GA, jadi yah lumayanlah.
5. Kemana2 pake kereta aja, sebab taksi mahal gila. Sekali buka pintu ¥660-¥780 alias sekitar 100ribuan rupiah ajah. Uber juga sama aja, karena tarif Uber di sana wajib disamain sama tarif taksi kata sopir Ubernya. JR Pass perlu nggak? Kalo cuma seputaran Osaka-Kyoto-Tokyo aja sih nggak perlu. Cukup beli 1-2 day pass aja selama di Kyoto dan Tokyo kalo mau eksplor. Buat icip2 shinkansen ambil aja rute terpendek Osaka-Kyoto, cuma 15 menit 150ribuan. Dari Kyoto ke Tokyonya gimana? Pakai night bus Willer Express 500ribuan per orang untuk perjalanan 8 jam-an, enak sekalian ngirit ongkos hotel 1 malam :p
Ok guys, have fun in Japan!
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